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What is up you guys.
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I hope that whatever you're up to today, I hope you're having a good one and I just want to take the time to thank you for listening in to today's episode.
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So what I want to talk about today is what the heck I mean by flip houses like a girl.
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Why did I choose that name?
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What does it mean to me and what's the whole point?
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Okay, so that's what we're digging into today.
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So stay tuned.
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You're listening to the flip houses like a girl podcast where we educate, empower, and celebrate everyday women who are facing their fears, juggling family and business, embracing their awesomeness and wholeheartedly chasing their dream of flipping houses.
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Each episode delivers honest to goodness tools, tips, and strategies you can implement today to get closer to your first or next successful house flip.
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Here's your spiky-haired breakfast taco loving host house flipping coach, Debbie DeBerry.
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Alright, we're starting off this episode with a listener reveal.
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Yep.
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We're going to start doing these because this is so much fun.
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Okay, this review is by amber.
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She says, I'm really enjoying the podcast.
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My husband just left me in our remodeling company.
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I was scared.
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I wouldn't be able to do it, but you give me hope.
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Thank you, amber.
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Your words are totally humbling and I appreciate you for taking the time out to share this with me.
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I have a feeling that this recent hardship is not going to hold you back.
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Alright.
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Thank you again for your review, amber.
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Alright, you might be the next listener.
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Shout out.
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Alright, enough cheesy Debbie, let's get into it.
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What is the significance of flip houses like a girl?
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Why did I choose it?
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Well, let's go back to the origin, which is not very feel-good.
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Doing anything like a girl has been used to degrade someone of their physical and mental ability, right?
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It's been used to point out flaws or the fact that someone does something differently.
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What many young girls interpret it as is you're doing it wrong or you're not good enough or you shouldn't do that.
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It leaves some girls to think that they're powerless.
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Not only can the phrase degrade a girl's self esteem, but also their self worth and I know you know what it's like to question whether you're worthy, whether you're worthy love or success or that promotion or that raise or freedom or security, or fill in the blank.
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I know you've questioned that all because of your gender.
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Like I've said before, it is what it is.
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Now.
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How are we going to respond to it?
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Well, certainly not by sitting around and letting it be something that's negative instead, let's just flip the script.
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Alright, so I don't know about you, but I grew up in the 80s.
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Back in the days of big hair and shoulder pads and some of the best movies and music, if I do say so myself and Guess jeans, right?
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Remember those upside down triangles on the back, right pocket.
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Yeah.
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So I grew up in the 80s which also happened to be the time of not very many athletic options for girls.
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So if you were going to play sports, you were more than likely going to be on a team with boys and you were even more likely to be the only girl on the team or maybe one of two or three.
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I started playing soccer and baseball at the age of five and I happened to hear the phrases, you kick like a girl or you throw like a girl a lot.
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I was always taller than the boys until middle school at least when they hit puberty and that also happens to be about the time that we found fast pitch softball and my mom thought, you know what, it's probably time to switch over.
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And I agreed.
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Anyway, I continued to play through college.
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The thing was I had a really strong arm and throwing happened to be one of my strong suits.
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I remember in elementary and middle school, I don't know if you had this, but did you have something called field days where they had all these competitions like throwing a softball or long jump and high jump?
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I think I remember and maybe some different races.
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Well, I was not good at the other stuff, but I was really great at throwing the ball and I always won.
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I always beat the boys.
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So the insult of you throw like a girl was never directed at me, but don't get me wrong.
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I heard it a ton.
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I heard boys saying it to other girls.
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I heard coaches saying it about other girls, and I even heard boys saying it to other boys because that was the ultimate insult.
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Right?
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I grew up with four older brothers and a mom and dad who all encouraged me in my sports.
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I don't remember ever thinking that there was something I couldn't try because I was a girl, except for some strange reason.
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My mom was adamantly against me playing the drums.
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I wanted to play the drums so badly.
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Instead, she had me in piano lessons, but I wanted to play the drums.
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I just wanted to bang on the drums.
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Now, part of me recalls something about drums not being for girls or not being ladylike, which was something my mom often said, but meanwhile I'm playing baseball and soccer all year long in boys' leagues.
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Alright, so maybe it was really just a noise thing.
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That's what I'm thinking.
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She just didn't want me banging on the drums and now that I'm a mom.
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Oh yeah, I get it.
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My son did drums for about two and a half years, so yeah, I get it.
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He now plays guitar, which is so much better on my ears.
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So aside from the drums situation where my mom really did not want me to play the messaging from my mom was always, you can do and be anything you want, period.
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Of course.
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She also warned me that because I'm a girl, there would be unique challenges.
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I wouldn't have the same challenges as my brothers.
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My brothers wouldn't have the same challenges as me, but she reminded me often that if I was always true to me, if I was authentically me and embraced fully who I am and I committed to reaching whatever goal I had, meaning quitting is not an option, giving up is not an option, then I was guaranteed to reach my desired goal because the only similarity amongst everyone who does not reach their goal is that they quit.
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They gave up.
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That's the only thing that prevents you from reaching your goal.
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That means that when things get hard or when a roadblock comes up or a speed bump or a detour, that means that you cannot allow those things to mean anything other than, Oh man, let me figure this out.
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Let me get resourceful and figure out my way around this.
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Let me reach out to somebody who can help me.
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If you take a piece of paper and draw two dots like five inches apart and draw a straight line connecting those two dots, you're hoping that that's your path to success.
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You're hoping that's your path from where you are right now to where you want to go.
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Now that might be the plan and that might be the route, but your path is grab your pencil and draw a roller coaster up and down along that line and even to be even more precise, you need to do some backloops.
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Okay.
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Because on your way to reaching your goal, it's going to feel like you're taking steps backward.
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It's going to feel like you're not making progress.
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It's going to feel like you're never going to get there.
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So how do you make sure you get there?
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You keep showing up and you keep going.
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You have to be agile, you have to take other routes every now and then.
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It's not going to be straight from here to there.
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And do you know what the number one thing people struggle with when they're trying to reach any goal that they have?
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The number one thing people struggle with is mindset.
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It's not the steps, it's not the how to, it's not the tactical stuff.
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It is mindset and whether you want to acknowledge it or not, it is 100% true.
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The things that hold people back and prevent them from reaching their true full potential are their limiting beliefs, limiting beliefs will have power over you until you take the time to get awareness around them.
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Every single person has them.
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Nobody is immune to them.
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Every successful person, you know Oprah Winfrey for crying out loud has limiting beliefs, but what's the difference between her and someone else who had that goal, that same goal and didn't reach that level of success?
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They didn't take the time to understand their limiting beliefs so that they can acknowledge them and take them for what they are because what takes away the power of our limiting beliefs?
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It's just having awareness around them.
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That's it.
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It's as simple as that.
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Now I say it's as simple as that, but really the hardest work on anybody's entrepreneurial journey is their mindset work.
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Alright, so be sure you're doing it.
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Limiting beliefs are really important and I promise you I'm going to do a future episode on just them.
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Now to recap so far, the messaging from my mom has included two things.
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One is being true to myself and being super authentic and then to committing to a goal wholeheartedly being all in accepting nothing other than achieving that goal as success.
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The third constant message I heard from her was to leave people in places better than I found them and that is something I carry with me to this very day.
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It's something I teach my son and it's something that I'm super mindful of in my business and in my personal life, leaving people and places better than I found them.
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So basically my mom's messaging has really impacted the meaning of"like a girl" for me.
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So that messaging has played a huge role in what it means to me to do anything like a girl.
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Let me give you some examples of what doing something like a girl means to me.
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Number one, it means doing it with heart, meaning leading with compassion and truly wanting to help others.
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But we've got to be careful here not to get stuck in the people pleasing mode.
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I know that I have really battled bat over the years.
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Sometimes I fall into it again and I have to really be mindful and pull myself out of the people pleasing mode.
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Secondly, paying attention to the details, man.
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I feel like inherently we are sticklers for the details and guess what buyers like?
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Buyers like and pay attention to the details.
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Number three, doing something like a girl means wanting to empower others, so leaving people better than you found them.
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Number four, deeply caring about your reputation, the quality of the product and the way it looks.
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Number five, approaching negotiations with the mindset of how can I best serve this person versus Alright, hmm, let's see here.
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How can I get what I want?
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Number six, treating other people with respect and dignity while also standing totally in your power and then number seven is speaking up.
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Doing something like a girl means speaking up.
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You see something that isn't right.
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Speak up.
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When someone else is being mistreated, you speak up.
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When you are being mistreated, you speak up.
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You also openly communicate.
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You have open lines of communication with your lenders, your partners, your real estate agent, your buyers, the sellers, everyone involved.
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You have open communication.
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So those seven things, that's what flipping houses like a girl looks like.
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To me, that's what it means to me fully embracing who you are, leaving people in places better than you found them and wholeheartedly chasing after what you want.
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And let me tell you something, I do not reserve flipping houses like a girl just for women.
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I strongly encourage men to flip houses like a girl.
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My hunch is that it would actually help their business last longer because I think women are perfectly designed to be incredibly successful.
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House flippers inherently provided of course that this is a burning desire you have and that you are incredibly passionate about this because if you're not, then that's going to shine through as well and not in a great way.
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So when I was coming up with a name for this podcast, I wanted to accomplish a couple of things because real estate investing is so heavily dominated by men in most podcasts, training programs, coaching programs, websites, blogs, information is geared toward men.
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So for starters, I wanted to be very clear about who this podcast serves and that's women.
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Although guess what men, you'll get a lot out of it too.
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Secondly, I wanted it to be very clear that this podcast was going to be different and I wanted it to stand out because that means I'm being true to myself.
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This is a podcast by women for women that celebrates women.
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And lastly, I wanted the title to make you think we can't take everything at surface value, and I fully believe in being mindful and thinking about things in a deeper way than just what's on the surface.
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If I can help change the way that just one little girl out there interprets what it means to do something like a girl, then I have come full circle and ultimately this podcast has served it's purpose because this isn't about me and it's not even about you.
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It's about the ripple effect.
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When you walk away after listening to one of these and you feel totally inspired and motivated and excited and ready to take on the world, guess who feels that?
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Guess who's watching your kids and grandkids are watching.
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And that right there folks is the ripple effect.
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And when those little girls and little boys see you standing in all of your power, that right there changes the definition of what it means to do anything like a girl.
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Hopefully that makes sense to you.
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Now I know that sometimes when you're too close to something, it's kind of hard to describe it to someone else.
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So to me it is so super clear what flip houses like a girl represents or what anything like a girl represents.
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But again, I'm really close to it and it's had a lot of meaning in my life.
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I started hearing the phrase when I was five, so I hope it made sense.
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Alright, that is it for today's episode.
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I hope you listened to the don't give up peace and take that to heart, okay?
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Because that is the only way to get what you want is to not stop going after it.
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If you are getting any value out of this podcast or out of any of these episodes, would you do me a huge favor and help me reach more like-minded women by leaving a rating and review wherever you listen to this podcast?
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That's what helps this podcast show up in people's search results.
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Okay?
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So when they're searching flip houses in their individual podcast player, the ratings and reviews really do help.
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Okay?
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And I love hearing from you, so thank you so much in advance for helping me out.
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If I can instill in just one more woman out there that she absolutely can make a great living flipping houses, then that's my ultimate goal, okay?
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Because if she's empowered, her kids are going to be empowered.
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Alright, and be sure you check the show notes because I've got some goodies in there for you.
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And also I've got information about how you can get your hands on some apple airpods.
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Thank you so much for tuning into this episode.
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Whatever it is you have on your plate today, I hope that you do it like a girl.
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Alright, I'll see you on the next episode.
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Make it a great day.
